Try
by notyourordinary
Summary: It was a life that would be sheltered no more, a life that would be torn apart by war, betrayal and hatred and yet I refused to let it break me. This is my story. A tale of the life Theodore Nott and Aurelia Maysler shared. Rated M for Language later on.
1. Chapter 1

_Is a Dream a lie if it doesn't come true, or is it something worse?_

As a tear slid down my face I was overwhelmed by a staggering sense of self pity. It was the Christmas of my seventh year at Hogwarts and I was home for the holidays and I felt as though I was the most mistreated, unfortunate young girl alive to have to endure this tragedy at such a joyous time. I thought it was the worst Christmas ever!

I now know better, for I have suffered many Christmases worse than that one, but that Christmas shattered my childish seventeen year old belief that Christmas was a time when no wrong could be done, a time when everyone rejoiced…It was the Christmas I grew up.

I smile now as I remember how naïve I once was. You could say it was my first dose of reality for I had lived a sheltered, protected life until then, Yet it was a life that would be sheltered no more, a life that would be torn apart by war, betrayal and hatred. I would have to stand strong and proud without my parents support, i would have to make choices and decicouns i had never known i was capable of, and yet I refused to let it break me and even now with such dismal prospects I refuse to be beaten for I know that I can rebuild my life and that of my child into something better…

This is my story, My memoirs ...


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 1

* * *

_Let the tears come, Let them water your soul_

As the tear slid down my cheek I reached up to brush it away, jumping slightly as someone knocked on the door to my chamber. I didn't answer, for I found that I could not. My voice stuck in my throat as I tried to speak and finally escaped in a strangled croak but it didn't matter that I made to reply for the door opened anyway and my mothers head appeared round the door shortly followed by the rest of her body.

She saw me sat there with a tear rolling down my cheek and strolled over to me, she took my hand in hers and smiled at me with that smile only mothers who love you unconditionally can give and it gave me courage and strength but not enough.

'Don't cry Aurelia' She said 'It's just the ceremony today, you won't be going with him for another six months'

I chocked on a sob 'Then when do I have to marry him today?' I looked up at her still expecting my mother to kiss me and make it all better like she did when I scraped my knee when I was younger. But all I got was a sad smile.

You're perhaps wondering why a seventeen year old would be marrying someone against her will. Well in the wizarding world arranged matches were pretty common, mainly between purebloods. It allowed fortunes to be joined, alliances to be made and it prevented bloodlines from being watered down, something that I hardly cared about at all, it didn't seem worth all the fuss to me. An opinion that was perhaps better kept silent.

'It's easier this way Aurelia' She stood up and told me to follow her for the ceremony was starting – Yes and my life was ending I thought bitterly as I followed my mother, I paused to stare at myself in the mirror, my beauty hardly registering through my despair, my silky black hair cascaded in waves down my back, my pale smooth face had the most minimum amount of makeup on, applied at my mothers insistence. I looked the very image of her bride on her wedding day with one exception. My deep green eyes were completely devoid of happiness.

We went down the stairs into a small room that I guessed was used for ceremonies. Forcing my face into a neutral position I walked forward, I noticed with small relief that it was a small gathering; there were just enough people to bear witness to our union. I took a deep breath as I placed my hand into that of my future husband, Theodore Nott. The old wizard who was to perform the ceremony stepped forwards, he bound our hands together with a red ribbon to symbolize life and placed a green sprig on top to bless us with many children and I gave an involuntary shudder at the thought. We then proceeded to utter our vows and place the rings on each others fingers.

Glancing upwards I looked at for the first time that day the man who I would spend the rest of my life with. I looked at his smooth brown hair and light grey eyes, his strong straight nose and his mouth which was currently curled into a frown, and I suddenly realized just how skinny he was, he looked gaunt yet there was something alluring about him, something I didn't want to feel. So I didn't I simply looked away.

And so it was done we were married. After all the tantrums, tears and threats, after all of our parents planning and determination we were finally man and wife till death do us part- literally. I was now officially Mrs. Aurelia Nott.

Still holding my hand my new husband marched me out of the room with the few who were present following behind us. I wanted everyone to leave so I could go home and then go back to Hogwarts where it would be so easy to pretend that this wasn't happening. But it was and there was no escaping it, nor the guest. Who although they were few felt as though they had to make up for the lack of company by staying till late at night after the last person had left I allowed myself to slump down in a chair and breathe a sigh of relief.

My parents were deep in conversation with Mr. Nott but they were talking in low voices so I couldn't here what they were saying. Theodore was glaring icily into the fire gripping his glass of fire whisky and it was then I remembered that he had been going out with Daphne Greengrass since our fifth year. I had completely forgotten about that, no wonder she looked so miserable the last week of term. Yet I still did not consider her predicament worse than mine, she could have him if she wanted, if they were subtle…. Me? I was stuck with him.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2

_Where there is no struggle, there is no strength_

* * *

And so as the Christmas holiday drew to a close I prepared to return to school. Grateful to be getting away, to have somewhere to go where I could immerse myself in normality. Thankfully not many people knew of our marriage.

Despite this it was with a heavy heart with which I returned to school. I was sat in a compartment by myself finishing off a transfiguration essay, which I hadn't got round to doing over the holiday, when the compartment door opened I lifted my head up, and gave whoever might be entering my best slytherin glare, but I broke into a grin when I saw who it was. 'Pansy' I laughed as I jumped up to hug her 'Sorry about not meeting up over the holidays, I had a lot going on'

She smiled and nodded sympathetically, and whispered 'I know'. Pansy is probably the only person who I had told about my current circumstances. I knew that Theodore would have told Daphne. But I also knew that she wouldn't dare to say anything, so it didn't seem worth acknowledging that problem.

I sat down with pansy and relaxed it had always been me and Pansy since our first year, all the other girls latched onto us. Pansy revels in it, I didn't mind. I never needed a lot of people to feel happy with myself, I still don't, but I guess pansy likes the power that it brings. Blaise tagged along with us sometimes; it used to be us against everyone, we were all the family that we needed, but Blaise would have been with the boys then bragging about their holiday conquests. It makes me laugh when I look back on how we were. It makes me happy to know that some things haven't changed, namely Blaise.

We sat in a comfortable silence occasionally remarking on those who walked passed our compartment. The darkening outside was speckled with spots of white as it began to snow as we came closer to the school we changed into our robes.

As we clambered into our carriage I noticed how many empty ones there were, it appeared that many students hadn't dared return after realizing how the school was to be run. I didn't blame them they didn't have the security we had, back then we felt invincible, everything was ran to our advantage, now I can barely believe their arrogance and my foolishness and naiveté, I was taken in by it all. Fool that I was.

And so the new term began, and more and more students started disappearing, many tried rebelling against the Carrows, aided by Longbottom who was eventually targeted and had no choice but to flee. Thing settled for awhile, there were still the odd stunts but they were few and far between, many had lost their nerve and their faith. With Potter out of the picture and believed dead by many the school took on a mood of stoic resignation.

Until one night as summer was approaching we were roused from our beds and told to congregate in the great hall, apparently the castle was under attack. I know I'm breezing over a lot of the year but it's irrelevant to my story. As eventful as it was for other people all I can recall is a blur of days, weeks and months.

We evacuated into the Hogs Head were the younger students were to be taken to safety by sidelong apparition, assisted by older students. But as I stood there I realized that my sister was missing, she was a Ravenclaw in the youngest Weasleys year and she had the tendency to march to the beat of her own drum. Hardly believing what I was doing I turned back into the tunnel, as young a she was I knew she had stayed behind to fight.

With the bile rising in my throat I raced passed the Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors frantically searching for my sister as I approached the great hall I heard bangs and screams. The battle had begun.

Barely thinking I ran into the great hall, wand raised screaming my sister's name as I searched desperately for my little sister. I beam of light shot towards me and I deflected it stunning the death eater that has cast it. I smiled at the irony that too late I was standing up for myself and going against expectations. At the last hurdle I decided that I would not stand by and allow oppression and hate to win. All this thanks to my sister's courage. I had to find her. Casting the best jinxes I could think of I ran through the castle my heart in my mouth as I stumbled over a body partially covered by shadow would I get there in time. As I rounded a corner I saw Ginny dueling two death eaters, she was outnumbered, without thinking I aimed at stunning jinx at the one to her right just as she took out the one to her left. She spun round to see who has aided her. She saw me and frowned in confusion.

'What are you doing here? Why are you fighting for us? Shouldn't you have fled with the rest of the scumbags?' overwhelmed by her questions I hardly knew how to answer, or even which question to answer.

I barely acknowledged the insult as I gasped desperately 'My sister? Have you seen her? Have you seen Emmeline' I was frantic, even her hostility towards me couldn't reduce my desperation. She shook her head…and my worry increased I turned to leave...until I heard

'I think she's in the grounds' I nodded my thanks and kept going, I only just heard what she shouted after me. 'Thank you for helping me, for helping us'

As I raced down the hallways, everything came to a still, Lord Voldemort's voice rattled though the school demanding Potter and promising death if he was denied. As I reached the entrance hall I saw the wounded and dead being brought in, my heart twisted and dropped as I saw Katie Bell half carrying my sister into the great hall.

'Emmeline!' I sobbed as I raced towards her. She raised her head exhausted and looked at me, surprised.

'What are you doing here?' she gasped, I moved to help her but she shook me off and sat on one of the unbroken benches.

'I came for you'

'Well then you can leave, I've chosen a side and I'm sticking with it, so you can run off and join them, I know you want to.' I crouched down so that I could look into her eyes and she regarded me with distrust, curiosity and was it possible…with hope.

I took her hands in mine and said 'I'm with you, you're my sister and I love you, no really I do, we might not always see eye to eye but I'm not going to let anything happen to you and I'm not going to let anyone be governed by prejudice and hate simply because of their beliefs, Its stupid' I finished lamely. I couldn't resist smirking as my sister gapped at me.

'I didn't know you thought like that'

'I didn't until recently'

She smiled at me and I leaned forwards to hug her awkwardly. She winced and I stood back to inspect the damage of the wound. It was deep but it wasn't anywhere fatal, thank God, a simple healing charm would do, I helped her over to Madame Pomfrey, confident that she would be all right I left to help with the wounded. Almost too soon the hour was up and we prepared for battle to start again as we waited we heard the voice rattling through the school again.

It was over we had lost. Potter was dead. Despair howled through us and I clutched my sister's hand, I hardly had time to wonder what would happen now before the fighting broke out anew. Now more fierce than ever, both sides duelled with no restraint. This was to the death, I realized this now. But still in my heart I was glad that I was fighting because I chose to, not because some madman had forced me to, like poor Draco. Suddenly cries of 'he's alive' 'Potter's alive' rang through the hall, I turned and there was Harry duelling Lord Voldemort, and before it had even begun it was over. Voldemort had been defeated by Harry Potter, The boy who lived, the chosen one, the saviour of the wizarding world. Cheers filled the air as everyone rejoiced, wept with relief, hugging each other ecstatic to be alive. I simply sighed and clasped the wall, my legs turning to jelly as the adrenaline left my body, we had won and I had survived although to what I did not yet know. My parents had played their hand to soon and I felt myself turn cold as I remembered that I was still married to the son of a death eater but I pushed the thought from my mind. Emmeline and I were alive and my family would not be persecuted as blood supremacists thanks to my sister.

Breathing in the jubilant atmosphere of people who have escaped death and overcome a tyrant I allowed myself to believe that everything would work itself out …


End file.
